Impulsive - so sue me
Now that I am moving onto to my surgery rotation - which scares me alot - I'm taking a moment to slap down my true personality and assume the proper respectful Med 3 position: meek. I'm going to be at a big outside hospital that sees alot of trauma and charity cases. That puts me in line to see alot of 'poor outcomes' (aka, people are going to die on the table.) It sounds bad, but I haven't seen someone die for the past few months.I just spent a month on neuro and psych, neither of which were my cup of tea. They are two different breeds of people. The truth is, they were WAY too laid back for me. I'm intense. It doesn't make me an intense studier necessarily, but I'm just intense. If I'm doing something, it doesn't matter what it is, I'm doing it all out.
Sometimes this leads me to doing said thing RIGHT NOW. Yeah, I'm impulsive, but I don't regret that. It makes me the intense person I am. I'm dedicated and it makes sense to do it this very second. (Greetings from a future ER physician.)
Which leads me to a pet peeve: people who say they are going to do something and then don't. If I say I'm going to do something, I do it. If I don't do it, I'm sure as heck trying to do it or contacting the appropriate place and telling them why I'm not doing it. It doesn't matter what is going on elsewhere in my life; I'll probably still do it. Heck, I returned phone calls on Thanksgiving with my family in the car.
However, I have a strong suspicion that I'm going to have to clamp that off during surgery. It's going to be hard for me to because I am who I am - and you should probably not leave me alone with the patient and the scalpels when you aren't scrubbed in yet. I probably can't do the entire operation myself, but I have a pretty good idea how to start - yep, another budding ER doc. :)
Labels: impulses, personality, relationships, surgery
posted by Allie @ 5:49 PM
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